I cant believe I broke down in tears in the middle of the hospital, everything was getting to much, I felt sorry for George, no body knows how much I want him back, even he doesn’t understand how much I need him. I cried because I feel sorry for what George is going through, for me breaking his heart, for me, but mostly for him. I need him and he doesn’t understand. Or maybe he does and just doesn’t want anything to do with me, but he told me he loved me, maybe that was just because he knew I wanted him to.

I think it all over the hospital that I burst out crying; I can’t even remember the last time I cried. I just need George, I wish I could take it back to our first night, the time he wanted me to cut his hair, I wish we could just turn back time, but I don’t want to do it just for me. I wish I could turn it back for Izzie. We’ve become shall I say friends unlike when we first meet and we hated each other, I turned it around for George, I turned around the hate-hate relationship with Izzie, still not a fan of Meredith, still have to keep quite about the adulterous McSex with her and McDreamy, I want to tell Addison, I’m not even sure if she knows. That reminds me I need to talk to Addison. That’s on my list of things to do.

Things to do:

1. Try and get George to talk to me
2. Remember to have that drink with Addison
3. Sort out my patients.

I’ll tell you when I finish them all.

What can I say? Life is screwed up. If its not one thing it's another. What is it about Mark, if your not thinking about him, someones talking about him, or even if thats not going to happen it seems like someone's hoping you will bring him up. What makes it even worse is that I have to work with him!

I need to remember to have that drink with Addison, if we are ever off at that same time which will be hopefully soon. I kinda like her, as a friend, I havnt really had any female friends they had mostly been guys and then we would end up in each others pants. God hates me.

Meredith, what can I say? Talk about Mark she seems almost as bad as him. Breaking up Addison and Derek and now questioning herself if she should even be with Derek, talking about being Dark and Twisty (The Interns words not mine!)

Anyway I have to go, I'm needed for some reason my pagers just gone off see who it is as soon as I've posted this.

Callie

Oh and God please give me some hot guy who I can fuck!! Possible someone really hot, I dont really care who!